How to be single The experiential dating advice blog

To Russia! For Love!

I have a dilemma: on September 13^th, I am heading to Russia (a.k.a. Motherland) to visit my family (grandparents, aunts/uncles, godparents, etc.) On its own, this is awesome, since I haven’t seen The Family in 2 years. However, the awesomeness of the situation is complicated by the fact that one of my grandfathers (on my dad’s side) is forever trying to coerce (not convince) me to come live in Russia, whether it’s to study, to work, or to get married. So, he wastes no opportunity to try and set me up with “a nice Russian boy”. I love my grandfather, but I just do not want to move to Russia! (I will not state my reasons here) And, how do I tell him so outright without hurting his feelings? (Never mind that my command of Russian is far subpar to express the valid reasons for not wanting to go back there). So, thus far, I’ve avoided his guilt trips by:

1. Telling him all about my great job in Canada
2. Stating that I wish to do graduate studies in Harvard or Cambridge rather than some university in Russia (he is a Professor himself, and has a true appreciation for World’s top universities, so he REALLY buys into that; plus, I’m pretty awesome, so I actually stand a chance at one of those universities)
3. Having a boyfriend or an object of affection that I could talk about at length

Unluckily for me, as he gets older (71 currently; those unreasonable old men!), his desire to have great-grandkids grows. Also exacerbating the situation *this* year, is the fact is that my sister is there (in Russia) currently… with her long-term, live-in boyfriend.

SO, I have challenged myself to the impossible (given my track record): to go on 3 dates with the same guy before my departure to Russia, so that I can at least “talk” about someone to my grandparents and avoid the big “set-up”.

Will I succeed or dramatically fail? Stay tuned, and I’ll keep you posted. I also avow to take an offensive approach to on-line dating, which has – in recent times – been  my biggest source of dates. Thus far, I've taken the "sitting duck" approach: basically waiting for men to message me and not vice versa.