A picture is worth < 1000 words: how to write a great on-line profile – Part II
My newfound love is one of the inspirations for this article. However, another major inspiration was my friend and personal mentor – Robert – who has recently became engaged to a lovely lady he’d met online just 5 months ago. In fact, they are getting married in December. Some of you are probably thinking “Fools!” but, to those who know them, it’s quite clear that it’s a match made by Gods themselves (perhaps by Neptune, since they met on Plenty of Fish.)
Some background information: I had been trying to convince Robert to try online dating for years. But, he didn’t do it. “I’m not ready,” he claimed over and time again. Finally, in May 09, he ‘became’ ready. Easier said than done! Robert painstakingly and tirelessly worked on his profile, to ensure that it was representative of his true self – and this process took (too) much time. During the – oh probably 2 weeks – he solicited the feedback of his family and friends, on everything from the perfect screen name to photos to the description.
Finally (finally!) in June, he released his masterpiece on PoF. Before I reveal his profile to you (with his permission), I will confess that, had I been perusing his profile, I would have never messaged him. I just don’t ‘get it.’ But, that is exactly what his intent was: to ensure that only people who “got it” messaged him. In fact, some women e-mailed Robert stating “I don’t understand your profile.” Well, too bad for them, I say!
So, the lesson of this post is: make your profile your own.
Profile of Eloquent Woodman:
Interests
outdoors canoeing hiking
teaching philosophy spirituality
music yoga massage
cooking entertaining red wine
campfires thunderstorms poetry
travel trail biking writing
books movies cuddling
live theatre art galleries sushi
family friends deep conversations
About Me
I'm an ambivert with an energizing job. My life makes a difference.
I'll tease your brain and I don't come in a box. I'm kind of
refreshing and unexpected because I'm yours to discover but there's
always more to me.
I think a lot and I feel a lot. I choose the few over the many, and I
have my doubts about certainty. I'm wrong about a lot of things, but
I'm open to the possibility that I might be wrong about that too. I
learn more that way and have more fun, because it hurts to be
constipated. (When that happens, I eat chocolate.)
I like relaxing in the evenings and recharging on vacations. I spend
time writing, speaking, and teaching. I lead people in creative ways
and I am trusted to develop the somewhat young and impressionable in a
variety of settings. I love people by seeing the unique possibilities
within them. (If your mom and dad really love you, or if you have a
best friend who totally believes in you, you know what I'm talking
about.) I make my own music and I'll fool around on the piano and let
the emotions flow.
Creativity and playfulness are big turn-ons for me. I find women that
confidently and naturally show their strength and smarts are
particularly sexy. I admire breadth, depth, balance, integrity and a
sense of history. My family and friends are very important to me. I'm
a fan of cuddling, and I ardently embrace the unexpected options.
(Sometimes I do let opportunity knock a while though, but it's 'cause
I'm in the shower.)
I need to get dirty and I need to clean up. I'm into both town and
country. I live for today with a general direction for tomorrow. I
change my plans not my character. I dress up and I dress down. I like
nature, culture, have high standards in cooking, and I think eating
healthy tastes best.
I am adventurous and spontaneous, but I believe in boundaries and
limits. I hope you have some intelligent ones, as I'm attracted to
people who respect themselves. I like pie crusts, nuts, vegetables and
potatoes, but I'll never ask for a second helping of flaky, crazy,
dumb or lazy. I like responses that dare to be different and emphasize
brain over boob. It's not about length: let me know I've struck a
chord by attempting to pluck one of your own. That way, we don't waste
our time stringing each other along.
Are you a stream of consciousness?
You have a fairy godmother.
You approve of semicolons, compound sentences and appropriate capitalization.
You are artistic, synergistic, optimistic and uber-califragilistic. (Jawohl!)
You are musical, whimsical, historical, sexual, ecumenical and biodegradable.
Your rejection of "starved to perfection" makes you a wiser exerciser.
You prefer organically grown and also orgasmically groan.
You can take a hike.
You're good for the planet and you're good for me.
Like a river, are you elemental? Always true to yourself; not watered
down. Now ebulliently energetic; now deep and still. Here a gentle
trickle; there a powerful rush. Warm. Cool. Breathtaking. Always
refreshing. I like your hidden dangers, your twists and turns, but you
can't be about meaningless forking or hooking up.
As Catwoman and Selina Kyle, are you deeper than a puddle, more
powerful than a logical motive, faster than speeding bullshit? Do you
stand for truth, justice and the Canadian way? Could you handle
someone who deeply understood you without ever actually being able to
do so, challenged you, never let you get away with it, had depth,
intensity, serenity and character and a hot ass and was maybe the kind
of person your mom warned you about while also secretly being in
favour of?
I'm looking for a woman who will bring out the absolute best in me and
I'll do the same for her. I need it all, sometimes both of us going
zoom-zoom, sometimes one fast, the other slow, sometimes you,
sometimes me, sometimes we lie still under the stars and listen to
your heartbeat. You could be the one -- or one of the ones -- a number
ten gale on the Beaufort Scale. I'd spend an eternal moment in the
silent anticipation of your softest breath. Hit me like a force of
nature, or blow me away with whispered depth and strength.
P.S. The Beaufort is a 12 point scale, so you only need to be an 8.3.
First Date
I'm focused on finding a soul-to-soul match for the long-term, because
that's where the real excitement and fulfillment is. I don't care how
much hair I have to climb (Rapunzel), how many beauties I have to kiss
(God give me strength!), or how many witches, trolls and goblins are
involved (they make for good stories). Along the way, I'm into having
fun and being playful and making some new friends by helping them get
a better idea of who they are and what they want (without charming the
pants off them).
Boldness earns my respect. Flakiness and hesitation are your
subconscious saying you're not right for me. If most of your physical
activity takes place within your digestive system, I won't be able to
keep up with you. And most importantly, if you believe a first date is
a long-term relationship, then the voices in your head are telling you
that you're MUCH too good for me! Listen to them! (I'm pretty sure
every woman on this site could recommend guys who would be PERFECT for
you.)