Bobbing for Adam’s Apple in the Big Apple: Epilogue
I’ve told the story of my adventures in NYC to many friends (some have had the misfortune of hearing it >5 times) and in the end, everyone wants to know: “Do you still keep in touch with Adam?” This is one of the reasons that prompted me to write an Epilogue this multi-part saga.
The short answer is yes: Adam and I still communicate. But, before I get to that, let me detail the denouement with Tony the Chef.
What I failed to mention in Part 2 of this post, is that during our date, I added Tony to my Facebook. (Why, you ask? Well, what was I supposed to do when Tony was figuratively breathing down my neck as I searched for him on Facebook, with his smart phone in hand and at the ready, so he could accept my friend request right away?)
The first thing that Tony did once we were ‘Facebook Friends’ was what any self-respecting creep would do: went through my entire profile, and ‘Liked’ all of my bikini shots. Thanks, Tony. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate a man who appreciates my body, but at that stage of our ‘relationship’, he was sending the wrong message. But, as you’ll see, at least his message was consistent throughout…
And truth be told, I’m used to this: i.e. guys ogling my bikini shots. A close guy friend once confessed that the first thing he does when a girl adds him to Facebook, is go through all her beach photos.
Tony and I chatted a few times via the Facebook chat. For your entertainment, here’s an excerpt of our conversations:
Tony: hi baby (: what at are you up 2
Me: going to bed in like 5 min; have to get up early to get ready for my conference
Tony: oh i thought u going to ask meet to come and meet u
Me: yeah, no
haha; sorry! I had to be ready to work tomorrow
Tony: ); when u will come again in ny
Me: Aug 2012
Tony ): no u have to come sooner
(Do I now?!)
Tony: why u dont find the same job but in ny
Me: Because I like where I live.
Seriously, I don't want to move to NY just because. Maybe in a year or 2 I will, but now right now.
Tony: you have to choose me or where u live
(well, that’s an easy choice… and that’s what I told him…)
Me: you know, I've known you for 1.5 hours. So, it's an easy choice to make.
Tony: hahahah, yea i know but i am good guy good husband for u
[…]
Me: Met any exciting people as of late?
Tony: Yea but nothing special! What about you?
Me: Nope - but that's to be expected. Good thing I'm not desperate. I figure I'll give it another 8 years then I'll start getting worried.
Tony: Oh than i can't wait for you
(Oh dear! How will I ever get on with my life?!)
Me: I hope that you weren't seriously planning on doing that!
Tony: Doing what ?
Me: waiting for me
Tony: Why not ?
Me: Because you met me for 1 hr, and I live in Canada, and don't actually have any intention of moving to NY. Or the US, for that matter.
Tony: I move to Canada
(Yes, b'y?!)
Me: Really? Well, I hope it's because you want to, and not for anyone. You are a really nice guy, but not my type. Although, I have to say, but the sound of it, girls in Canada are much nicer, so you'd probably have better luck finding someone here.
Tony: Thanks
(I won’t even start on how I feel about people who don’t believe in capitalization, punctuation, and/or substitute words with numbers.)
See what I mean about Tony being consistent? Consistently creepy. Following that final exchange, I deleted and blocked him. Gents (and Ladies too)… it is absolutely unacceptable to want to move to another country for someone you had known for 1 hour. It is not romantic. It’s a ticket to a restraining order.
On to Adam. I already mentioned that we still converse, and quite regularly at that. He continues to entertain me with his escapades; and I entertain him with mine. I’d describe our relationship as ‘friendship’; nothing more nothing less.
In fact – and I’ll withhold the corroborating details – I’m pretty sure that had we met under different circumstances (i.e. those where I was actually looking to have a relationship in New York) then it probably wouldn’t have worked out with Adam. We might not even have met.
What I take away from my debaucheries in New York is a great memory. And a friend. J